When Down, Remember When You Were Up There

 - SK Bandar 1, OKK Abu Bakar Road, Tawau [day X of quarantine]. 10th of May 2020 (Sunday), 04:19PM

In what seemed like an eternity, I finally have found the strength to put up yet another post on this blog. It does look like it's dying, to be honest. But like any other recent posts, I'm determined to resuscitate this site. Mind you, this post per se is an overly due one, not to mention that it'll be mostly selfies.

A war memorial park in Ranau. From the outside, it looks like nothing. But once you step inside, there is this abundance of sentimentality. I read through some of the descriptions and info, all I can say is, this nation is of blood and of tears.

Gaddamit, I had a passable body back then. Now, especially due to this quarantine, I've been gaining fat and losing muscles like crazy.

 These are my hiking mates a.k.a mountain buddies.

Only God knows how excited I was as we reached the first gate of the hike. The registration and preparation was quite cumbersome; we had several issues regarding the fee and member replacement (one of us couldn't make it, so she arranged a replacement). But our excitement trumped over that slight problem.

 Ewi, whom I consider so much an older brother.

 Aizat, whom I consider so much a younger brother.

  This, if I'm not mistaken, was taken on our third way up.

 Taking a brief rest while enjoying the air.

Yeay! Finally reached the checkpoint. Aizat and I quickly went to the cafe which was so warm and home-like. I bet it falls under the category of cabin.

So, this is our place to stay the night. The night was freaking cold, man. Like, -2 degree cold.

 I guess this is the view the angels get to see everyday, huh..

 Lifetime achievement: embarking the top of Sabah and Malaysia. The feeling is unlike any other.

 

 The whole squad. Sadly one wasn't able to reach the summit. She didn't feel well.

Taking the opportunity to promote my book. I hope this isn't the only book I'll ever write.

There was this brief moment where I sat alone on a boulder, in the dark, facing one of the crests of this beautiful mountain. It was dark, the wind was strong. I clasped my fingers on the safety harness/rope, hoping that my skinny body wouldn't be blown by the turbulence. As I sat there, everything I ever learned, knew and experienced in life came rushing, like that moment was the conclusion of all those moments. I felt, presently, that if I was to die right then and there, I wouldn't complain. Of course I have so much things to say and do, but the serenity was cosmic and transcendent. I think I shed a tear or two. I'm only human, bha.

 

I wish I could do this all over again. It truly was a life-changing experience.

People said, once you've successfully conquered the mountain, you haven't just conquered a gigantic stone. You've also conquered something lazy, uninspiring, Kafkaesque and lifeless in you. And I do feel that way. I might not be a nobler person as I managed to kiss Kinabalu's forehead, but I know I'm more grateful than ever before. I began to see things far differently, mostly gratefully and more tolerant. I used to think that I worth nothing. Now, whenever I feel down, I just whisper to myself:

"Man, didn't you conquer Mount Kinabalu, the highest mountain in Malaysia?"